What’s Love Got to Do With It?


photo by Elizabeth Good

photo by Elizabeth Good

“What’s love got to do with it?” So goes the line from the popular song. Here we are in the month that is known for its celebration of love. Why does the world revolve, for so many people, around love? How does a psychic reading enable us to come closer to where we want to be in the realms of love? What is the importance of love in a spiritual approach to life?

Although there are myriad types of love, the focus in this “month of love” really seems to come down mostly to intimate love, expressed as romance and as eros. This theme, in both its fulfilling and heart-rending aspects, so often fills the thoughts and feelings that make up our waking lives-and even our sleeping lives. Whether we are newly in relationship, have been in relationship for a long time, are swearing off of intimate relationships, or bounce around amongst these various states, almost all of us seem to be somehow in relationship to relationship!

Romantic and erotic love are often intricately related, but certainly can manifest separately, even though the way they interweave (or don’t!) is often the source of some of our own greatest pains and pleasures. Romantic love can include the familiarity and knowingness of comfort and companionship that we crave, as well as the security of human contact in a world which seems uncertain. Given that connection is one of our deepest human needs, and abandonment is one of our greatest fears, is it any wonder that we experience some of our most intense feelings from either getting love, or from having it pulled out from under us?

Erotic love is often experienced simultaneously with the pull towards emotional intimacy associated with this definition of romance above. Yet, erotic love can later catalyze romantic love, the urge for emotional intimacy can lead later to erotic feelings, or the two feelings can be altogether separate. The intensity of erotic love is certainly one of the most powerful forces that we experience. This is life-force at its most basic and passionate. But other aspects of our journey through life’s lessons has everything to do with coloring why this energy plays out for us as it does.

Physiological, psychological, emotional, karmic, genetic, mental, cultural and collective issues can affect any aspect of our lives, and naturally love is no exception. In a reading with a growth-oriented psychic, many aspects of our human journey through love can be addressed. We might look at what went wrong in a failed relationship. The focus will be upon the deeper reasons for the failure, and how we can work with our own habits and beliefs to access a better state of love in the future. These deeper understandings can help to release the pain of past disappointments, or help us to have greater compassion for our selves and our current partner(s). Tendencies in partners that have been picked, and why one attracts these, can be useful to look at. At times, even the karmic aspects of why partners are together is tremendously helpful to see. We always have lessons to teach one another for our soul-growth.

As our minds become clearer and eased by such insight, we roll up our sleeves and prepare to do the work ahead involved in reaching greater fulfillment. This is when tailor-made tools for the next steps may emerge, and we begin to understand how to approach love from an altogether more beneficial standpoint.

Harmony with others, fulfillment in relationship and ourselves: these are things which most of us want, and which the psychic can help us to get closer to. The trick is to be clear about the motives, baggage, or agendas we carry into loving. When we have clearer information about these issues, it can help us to become better at the finding, receiving, and the giving of love.

By working consciously with that which arises for us in love relationships, we can always learn lessons about our self. With the help of a psychic perspective, we begin to understand this, and to see the ways in which we can evolve into someone who has more self-love. This self-love is part of the foundation for a spiritual life. Our true sense of self, based neither on grandiosity nor self-aversion, forms the core of our intrinsic worth. The lessons and trials of love in relationship to others can bring us to a deeper and firmer resting within this self-love, our stable spiritual center.

And then, a love which can fill both our hearts and our bodies can begin to manifest. The ecstasy which we often seek through an intimate relationship begins to be accessed as a part of our ever-present spiritual base. We no longer mistake it for something which can be gotten solely “out there.” We begin to know that we are that love which we sought, and we experience ourselves as resting within the love in our own hearts. Rather than a need to fill an empty hole inside or play out old patterns, being in intimate relationship becomes a joyous choice and a fulfilling expression.

Originally published as The Wider View © 2001-2002. All rights reserved. Please contact Elizabeth for permission to use any material contained herein.

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